Thirty three

No peace on the shitter.

Fairly often as an ER tech you get hassled about everything "Where are my VS?" "Did you do my IV in rm 19?" "where is my coffee?" "Why didn't you replace the water in the water cooler?" Usually this stuff is already done or in the process of being done and the asking party just does not realize that the task has been completed. I have found and said in this here blog the ONE thing I have never been hassled about doing this job is when I have to take a dump. When my high bran breakfast hits my bowels. BOOM! It's time to go. It's nice and quiet in there because maintenance screwed up and never attached the speakers after a pipe busted in there to the overhead paging system. Unless a person gets thrown into a wall on the other side of the door you don't hear anything.

I had to take a dump. I had been holding it for close to two hours my bowels were cramping and I was starting to get the walking farts. It's a sure way of my body telling me that "Dude, really get to a toilet soon or you're gonna shit yourself." I finished up my latest task at hand and went to the shitter. Without giving out TMI let's just say holding back a bowel movement for that long makes for a long visit in the toilet.

I was not worried because I've never been hassled about taking a dump, no where....ever. Not even when I was in the Army, the shitter is sacred in a sense. When asked I'm honest "Hey, I was in the shitter." Then it's a curt "Oh ok" and we move on. Also I was on shift with the Rockin' Redhead charge nurse. A veteran nurse who is very competent, super cool and honestly not bad to look at. She's been at BCH for a long while and knows how it goes. She's great. Well unbeknownst to me she went to a meeting of some sort and one of the middle-upper managements fell out of their office long enough to cover the area Rockin Redhead was charging that day.

Who is doing the charge duties you may ask. Well this character is a recent addition to the blog "The condescending nurse" I had a recent run in with her in the last few weeks. There is one or maybe actually several like her in every department. They usually rear their ugly heads when a new person is in the department or if they have to deal with staff members who are not licensed or if they are dealing with nurses who have not been in the trenches for as long as them heavens help you if you have only been a nurse for 20 years and she has been one for 21 years. naturally as a tech I feel I get the brunt of this kind of haughty behavior. I've dealt with them in many ways usually letting them drown or telling them to FOAD maybe both depending on the mood.

I come back into the area I get rolled up by the condescending nurse who is upper mid-level management type. One thing that is known that I am (despite what I say here) a very hard worker. I'm always proactive and on task. First thing out of her mouth "Where have you been I have been paging you?" Which meh, it happens so I answer honestly "I was using the bathroom" Choosing not to speak bluntly with the condescending nurse because this is not the time for it. I'm honestly expecting the "Oh..ok". She looks at me and says again "Well I was paging you, you need to be in the department."  Which really takes me aback. She is clearly implying I had wandered off someplace. I tell her "I was in the department, I was on the toilet." CN then says "I was in the department too and I was paging you."

I'm puzzled by this I have clearly stated that I was in the toilet perhaps she needs some clarification. "Hey, if you must know I was having a massive bowel movement" By giving TMI I was hoping to back her off and avoid a write up of some sort. Nope, she's squarely letting me know that I am not getting away with literally shit. I change gears, "Ok I'm here now what can I do to help?" hoping that this would change the tone of the conversation. She says "It's too late now, I did it myself already."  She is not interested in changing any tone.  Obviously she is showing me that she is in charge and she thinks I am slacking off and by slacking off I have made this nurse of "29 years of experience " do some work besides shuffle papers. I have not given up yet because this is the kind of thing that can haunt you later "CN all I can say is that I was here, I was in the bathroom having a massive bowel movement I had held for almost 2 hours, we can't hear pages in the men's bathroom, if there is something you need done let me know." Not letting me have the last word in the conversation she says "I am in the department too and I am in charge, when I page you, you need to respond."

I face palm as she walks off, she never heard a word I said. Which again is common for the ER tech Crusty or not. By not seeing me as a person of even minimal importance she does not even regard my very word.  I never learned what this important task was. I did find out that Rockin' Redhead got me out of getting paper put on me (which would have been a very ugly experience for all concerned) RR told me that she was cautioned to "Keep an eye Crusty ER Tech" for the rest of the day.

What could be learned from this. Well I could just shit myself, which would cement my reputation as a world class nut job. I could ask permission to use the bathroom, which reminds me of what prisoners have to do. I could suggest that if it's so important that you get in touch with techs that hey, buy radios or tag us like they did in other hospitals. The thing is that I am an adult and really I should never have to ask to use the bathroom.

I hate to say this, I think Condescending Nurse 29 (for 29 years experience) and I will have other conversations later down the line that are similar to this one. Perhaps I'll just shrug my shoulders and state "I have nothing to say because you don't hear what I am saying." which will serve to piss her off, decisions...decisions...

Well I better get my skates on, it's a Tuesday after a long holiday weekend.